Jar of Psychoses Sword Guide

A psychoanalytic jar is obtained from the 2013 yearly familiar Angry Jung Man. These can be used on specific NPCs (and Jick) to get jar of psychoses, which can also be bought in the mall.

There are 7 jars.

Associated with each jar is a non-tradable sword. All the swords have 20-40 damage, and require 200 Muscle to use. Byte, Truthsayer and the White Dragon Fang are 1-handed, while the Ginsu, Sword of Procedural Generation, Bloodbath and Meatcleaver are 2-handed. Only one jar can be used per day, and you must use a new jar every day. The area may or may not reset on rollover.

Parts of Truthsayer and White Dragon Fang are tradeable. The item that produces the Meatcleaver is also tradeable.

You can reach the jar areas from the couch next to a jar at your campground.

Information from the Alliance from Hell clan forums and the wiki.

1) Jar of psychoses (The Old Man)

Sword - Bloodbath - +2 resistance to all elements, 25-30 HP and MP regeneration

Reset time - Rollover if area is finished

In this area, you start with 37 crew, 11 crayons and 69 bubbles. In order to get Bloodbath, you must have 50 crew total after 50 adventures. Enemies in this area attack and eat the crew.

Noncombats in this area occur every 5 (or 4, if you pull the drain plug) adventures. This is not affected by modifiers.

Equip a mesmereyes contact lens and/or an attorney's badge to prevent enemies from eating crew. The giant squid will eat a crew member unless blocked by a noncombat even with these equipped.

You get a random selection from 4 possible sets for the noncombat. You should try to select in this priority.

1) Add crew members

Build a bubble mountain: 

+3 crew, -8-10 bubbles

Surround bubbles with crayons:

+5 crew, -6-16 bubbles, -2 crayons

2) Block giant squid

Cover ship in bubbles:

-13-20 bubbles

3) Add more bubbles and crayons if they're low (like below 20)

Ask Mom for more bath toys:

+2 crayons, +8-11 bubbles

Dump bubble bottle:

+13-19 bubbles

Open a new bathtub crayon box:

+3 crayons

4) sniff the shark or roc

You can block it with a noncombat choice (draw a bunch of coconuts for the roc, with -2 crayons and submerge some bubbles for the shark with -16 bubbles), but the mesmereyes will probably block them anyway.

2) Jar of Psychoses (Crackpot Mystic)

Sword - Byte

Spell Damage + 100%, 15% chance of spell critical hit

Reset time - Ascension or using a pixel pill when the zone is complete. 

The basis of this area is that there are four areas, with scheduled non combats in every area every 8 adventures. In each noncombat, there is the possibility to get a flickering pixel. There are 2 non combats in each area, with an option in the first noncombat unlocking the second one. 

Therefore, you need to use 24 adventures at least to get both pixels (8 to get the first NC's flickering pixel, 8 to choose the option in the first NC to unlock the 2nd NC, then 8 to get the flickering pixel in the 2nd NC). 

If you mess up and miss a pixel, you can try that NC again either after ascension or by using a pixel pill once you finish all four areas, which you would unlock by choosing the other option in the second NC. The pixel pill raises the ML in the area.

Each area will lower your attributes to 10 or 30. 

Regret Man's Level

Base muscle and moxie is limited to 30, and base mysticality is limited to 10.

This is your life 

1) Have 1000 MP, then choose "Then watch it again with the commentary on!" for the pixel.

I equipped a sea salt scrubs shirt (+400), drafty drawers (+200), and hopping socks (+200).

2) Have 100 MP, and choose "Watch it. All of it." to unlock the second NC.

The Wall of Wailing

3) Have a total of 60 elemental damage in each element (a.k.a. Prismatic damage) and choose "Make the tide resist you." for the pixel. The wiki says that you should get all 5 elemental buffs in Dreads (and pick up the trophy if you don't have that). I used a combination of an Ultracolor shirt with timers as effects and elemental damage buffs and items.

4) If you want to finish this area, then have about 15-20 prismatic damage and choose "Resist the tide." Another 8 adventures and you fight Regret Man.

Doubt Man's Level

Base muscle is limited to 10, base mysticality and moxie is limited to 30.

A Stupid Dummy. Also, a Straw Man.

1) Have at least 280 weapon damage, including bonus weapon damage.

2) Have about 100 bonus damage total and choose "It's just a dummy".

Slings and Arrows

3) Have 1000 HP and choose "Arrows? Ha." for the pixel.

sea salt scrubs shirt (+400), lawn dart (+300), nurse's hat (+300), hopping socks (+200), battered hubcap (+100)

4) Have 100 HP and then choose "Whatever. Might as well". You can then fight Doubt Man.

Fear Man's Level

Base muscle and mysticality is limited to 30, base moxie is limited to 10.

Snakes

1) Have 300 buffed moxie and choose "Tie the snakes in a knot" for the pixel.

2) Have 50 buffed moxie and choose "Run through".

So Many Skulls

3) Have 25 spooky resistance and choose "You fear no evil" for the pixel.

Astral shell (+1), six-rainbow shield (+3), shark jumper shirt (+3), orange peel hat (+3), elemental saucesphere (+2), and pec oil (+2), scarysauce (+2), black eyedrops potion (+9)

4) Choose "Yea, you walk through the valley." Survive the spooky damage, either by having lots of HP or keeping some of your spooky resistance stuff on. Then fight Fear Man.

Anger Man's Level

Base muscle, mysticality and moxie are limited to 30, and you can only attack.

Stupid Pipes

1) Have 25 hot resistance, then choose "Dive down" for the pixel.

Astral shell (+1), six-rainbow shield (+3), shark jumper shirt (+3), orange peel hat (+3), elemental saucesphere (+2), and pec oil (+2)

add

double-ice britches +4

vial of hot blood +4

infernal insoles +1

spf 451 lip balm +9

2) Choose "Screw it". Like before, survive the hot damage.

You're Freaking Kidding Me.

3) Increase all your attributes to 500. That's right, you have to increase them to 500 from a base of 30. Then choose "Wait a minute..." for the pixel.

4) Have all attributes at around 50. Then choose "Grrr. This is literally the worst thing." Then fight Anger Man.

3. Jar of Psychoses (Jick)

Sword: The Sword of Procedural Generation

Values are procedurally generated.

Copied from wiki:

A: +20% to +130% Muscle/Mysticality/ Moxie/Weapon Damage/Spell Damage

B: +20 to +80 damage to a random Element

C: Slight (+1) to Superhuman (+5) Resistance to a random Element

D: +30 to +140 Damage vs. Bugbears/Ghosts/ Orcs/

Skeletons/Vampires/ Werewolves/Zombies

E: one out of: Combat Initiative +15% or +20% chance of Critical Hit or +5 to Familiar Weight or +20% Meat from monsters or +10% Item Drops from Monsters

Reset time: Never

373 floors with 1 skeleton per floor, with ML increasing by 5 per skeleton. Each skeleton can also have different effects based on its name. Skeleton names do not change if you get beaten up. More than 1 effect is possible on higher floors.

2 effects at 135

3 effects at 225

4 effects at 285

5 effects at 300

Skeletons with fewer effects will also appear at higher floors.

I was at level 18 when I started.

Some of the skeleton names and effects:

Ghostly - physical damage is 1

Shiny - spell damage is 1

Shimmering - all elemental damage is 1

Thorny - counter-attack (enough to instantly kill me at the higher floors) when normally attacked

Unstoppable - no stunning or staggering

Disorienting - blocks skills sometimes, which is annoying

Shifty - sometimes avoids physical attacks and skills

Dancing - No combat items

Vicious - extra bonus damage

Thick - 50% more HP

Nimble - 40% more defense

Deadly - 40% more attack

Giant - 40% more defense and attack

There are also elemental damage every round types and elemental alignment names, but these are not that important unless you are at high levels and the extra elemental damage is killing you too quickly.

Basically, you need a lot of varied damage sources. Since I was a sauceror, I buffed my muscle mainly. Then I had to use other things because spells and regular attacks stopped working very well.

Some supplies:

Divine noisemaker - most situations unless you can't use combat items or physical damage doesn't work.

Crayon shavings - for lowering the enemy's attack and defense to survive.

Skull with a fuse in it - for when you can use combat items, but spells aren't allowed and you need elemental damage. Does spooky damage.

Ballpark hot daub - Does hot damage. If you get the above situations but the enemy is spooky aligned.

Passive damage and bonus weapon damage can also be important if you can't use combat items.

4. Jar of psychoses (Meatsmith)

Sword: Meatcleaver 

+35% meat from monsters, 100% weapon damage

Reset time: Rollover

You have to get a noncombat adventure here called The Sword in the Steak, that gives you an item called The Sword in the Steak. It is pretty random, but people have tried bumping up their meat drops, lowering their combat frequency, and tattering/runaways until they get the non-combat. 

Edit: I finally got this one. It took about 500 tatters and a lot of jars. I actually got it when I gave up, having run out of tatters after I'd bought about 200 from the mall. I very much doubt that meat drops or combat frequency has much of an effect...

Anyway, when you have the steak, have 1000 buffed muscle then use the sword in the steak to get Meatcleaver.

Note: The sword in the steak is tradeable.

5. Jar of psychoses (Captain of the Gourd)

Sword: Truthsayer

+12 ML, +40% Weapon Damage

Reset time: Rollover

So in this bit, there are 3 groups of 6 fights each plus a boss fight. The different enemies or the boss can drop the three parts of Truthsayer, which are a wad of spider silk, a sharp tin strip, and a goblin collarbone. The drop rate is pretty low (probably 1%).

Note: The three parts are tradeable.

6. Jar of psychoses (The Pretentious Artist)

Sword: Ginsu

+100% Food Drops from Monsters, Weapon Damage +100%

Reset Time: Rollover

In order to get the Ginsu, you need to get all four buffs in one ascension. The four buffs are obtained by using combat items on enemies in the Grocery Bag area and then going to the Table. Only one buff can be obtained per day.

You can buy the combat items in the mall or get them from the enemies in the Kitchen Drawer area.

Unceremoniously stolen from the Alliance from Hell Forums:

Day 1: Breakfast with Andrea: Meat+Knife, Bread+Knife, Batter+Spatula, Eggs+Whisk, Potatoes+Knife.

Day 2: Champion's Breakfast: Meat+Cutter, Bread+Torch, Batter+Whisk, Eggs+Torch, Potatoes+Torch.

Day 3: Tiffany's Breakfast: Meat+Spatula, Bread+Cutter, Batter+Cutter, Eggs+Spatula, Potatoes+Whisk.

Day 4: Breakfast Clubbed: Batter+Torch, Bread+Spatula, Eggs+Cutter, Meat+Whisk, Potatoes+Cutter.

Example:

Use the Artist's Butterknife of Regret on the bundle of Meat of Happiness to make sliced Canadian bacon (at least in the combat description). After using the combat items on the enemies, go to the Table and choose "Eat your breakfast"

7. Jar of psychoses (The Suspicious-Looking Guy)

Sword: White Dragon Fang (toy taijijian + magical battery)

+9 Prismatic Damage, Attributes +9%, +9 MP regeneration per adventure

Reset time: Ascension

You don't need to finish this bit, since the part you need for the sword is fairly early in the zone.

1. Fight some enemies in the Chinatown shops until you get a lobby card.

2. Go to the Sewer Lair and fight some other enemies until you fight the Sierpinski brothers, which can drop the magical battery, which can be pasted to the toy taijijian which is in the Chinatown shops after you defeat the brothers. 

There is speculation on the wiki that rubber gloves may increase the drop rate, as normal + item drop doesn't seem to help. I think it's probably not related. I'm trying every ascension to get these. 

Edit: I finally got the magical battery to drop. It took many tries, though I have no idea if the 3 rubber gloves I equipped helped or not. If I ever get another, I'll sell it.

Note: The magical battery is tradeable.